How Sex Conflicts Can Affect the Mental Illness

The whole subject of sex has too long been shrouded in mystery and fear-fear nourished by ignorance and misunderstanding. Other fears of mankind have been dispelled by understanding. We have learned that many diseases are caused by bacteria and viruses and not evil spirits. Consequently we no longer feel an irrational terror of disease but try to control it by isolation, inoculation, and chemotherapy. If sexual matters were similarly understood and openly considered by all, the sexual fears and conflicts so prevalent in our civilization would disappear.

Perhaps the greatest obstacle to universally healthy sexual attitudes is the fact that although many parents realize the value of sex education they feel inadequate and ill prepared to offer guidance to their children Tabula Rasa Online Retreat . They are still addicted with inhibitions, embarrassment, and a feeling that sex is unclean. As a result the child gathers independently a distorted, unhealthy collection of misinformation and misinterpretations.

Logically there is no reason why the psycho-sexual development of the individual should be regarded in a different light from other bodily functions. At each stage of development certain manifestations appear for which the child should be prepared. He is more harmed by anxiety and fear of things he doesn’t understand in regard to sex than by possible premature indulgence.

The injudicious handling of sex curiosity in young children may have lasting effects. Many of the barriers that prevent a normal, healthy response in adolescents toward members of the opposite sex have their origin in such early encounters. A deep-seated fear of sex may lead to repressions that make the young girl or boy shrink within a shell of reserve that they cannot explain Years of maladjustment and unhappiness may result from a few moments of mismanagement.

The most effective safeguard against the development of sex conflict ill adolescence is a campaign of sound sex education for both parents and children, the guiding principle for parents should be honesty and an air of casual frankness. It is not necessary to attempt a full discussion of biology in one sitting, for such earnestness and overemphasis is as extreme as complete refusal to discuss the topic.

In answer to the child’s questions about other things it is not customary to sit down and give him a full lecture on each subject. A simple, honest answer to his question is all that is needed, and although the original question may be followed by others for elaboration, the subject is soon dropped and the youthful mind follows its natural course to other things. The child’s interest may appear first in questions about his own origin and if the answers are supplied without emotional display or concern the child accepts them matter-of-factually. These suggestions may seem obvious to us but it is amazing how many of the children who come under observation at the clinic are totally ignorant of the scientific fundamentals of sex.

In a recent conversation with a client we were discussing what it takes to successfully navigate life. He was considering options for the next years of his academic life. Upon completion of his studies, he would take a year off to work – it would serve as his gap year; a pivotal period in every student’s academic life.

Being in his early twenties, he was concerned he might not be interested in working in the area he spent years studying for. I offered the advice that life was like a journey with bridges to cross. When you approach a decision in relation to your future path, you must cross a bridge. The bridge may be likened to a major life decision.

In order to navigate your way forward you must know what direction you’re headed – the path will reveal itself. You can never know what surprises await you. The past merely serves as a guide to the future. Life ultimately unfolds in perpetual moments.

Each thought or emotion creates the future in the present moment. To successfully navigate life, become aware and conscious of the present moment – that is, the thoughts and decisions you make now influence your future.

I’ve written in previous articles about the future is created from the seed of opportunity within the present moment. Future events are no more than present moment possibilities. While this may sound abstract, you have very little knowledge of future events. You only have control of your: thoughts, emotions and actions in each present moment.

Remember, your future can only be created in the NOW. It is worth re-addressing this concept.

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